So I'm like, "Hey, Mabel - did you see my post where I sang that John Denver song? Wasn't that the awesomest thing you've ever seen?"
And she's like, "Finner, put this in your pipe and smoke it."
So I'm like, "You think you're the only one who knows how to play an instrument?"
And she's like, "First off, the trumpet was upside down, genius. And secondly, if you're gonna act like a clown with that fake trumpet and drum set, here's some circus music for ya."
So I roll up my sleeves and give her my I'm-about-to-punch-you-in-the-face look - "Mae, what the $&*% was that #@%^ you just pulled?"
And she's like, "Well, that first one was a song I wrote back when I was a regular at the Hyatt Regency Hotel Bar on Wednesday nights. That second one was a number I composed for Barnum and his brother Bailey... and now I'm about to take you to church, Mary Magdeline."
Slightly defeated, I fake a smile and pull out my last card. "Well, I bet you can't put a shirt over your head like this and look like a complete lunatic!"
She doesn't say one word ... just lets the ivory do the talking.
To which I respond, "YOU, MY FRIEND, ARE A ONE-UPPER!"
