Finley Ames Skertich, 3 weeks and 4 days, was arrested last night for aggravated lack of sleep against her parents, Patrick and Sarah Skertich, at their South Loop condo.
Witnesses say the noise was so deafening they thought an NHL hockey game broke out, one with lots of scoring. "Ya know that noise they make at Blackhawks games when the Hawks score a goal, that MAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH, yeah, that one," said Eunice, the Skertichs across-the-hall neighbor. "Well, that just went on for what seemed like hours. I just figured Patrick was watching a recording of the 92 Stanley Cup Finals when the Hawks got swept by the Penguins."
Patrick, 31, told Chicago Police, "I never saw it coming and then BAM, she hit me with an entire night and not an ounce of shut-eye." Sarah Skertich, 29, literally didn't see it coming, "I'm so tired I'm dizzy, I couldn't make it out, I thought it was a veggie burrito."
Finley, when reached for comment, simply replied, "I gave 'em nine months to get ready - NINE MONTHS. If they weren't ready for it by the time I brought the heat, shame on them." And then, while walking away, cried out, "There's more where that came from!"
2 comments:
Sounds like you've had a rough week!
Never Fear, The End is Near!
Emily is two, and as long as you promise not to ask her Dad, I will swear she almost never gets up in the night and hasn't for months!
So you should all be sleeping through the night in roughly 17-35 more months! :]
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